Registering for the event 5 days
prior I wasn't too concerned with developing my skills {do that regularly} I
was more focused on developing my mental game. During those 5 days I started
creating a focus on what I wanted out of this tournament. It had to be a strong
purpose for going out there again. It couldn't be for obtaining podium
prominence or being emotional wanting to hurt the enemy. It has to be something
Deep that would allow me to perform at my best which would see
me through to the end not matter what the results were.Using some of the words from the people I mentioned in part one. On a daily basis I kept reading these quotes to myself to help me stay focused. I can honestly say it helped kept me positive and strong through that whole period.
When you feel that demon inside named fatigue tell him to F off and push his ass out of the way!-Gary Peters
Don't gotta be a champ, just better than you once were.- Shane Lees
Give everything you have on Sunday.- Josh Cavan
-The Xande Speech
In addition to show how serious I was I did something I was always afraid to do in past...GO ALONE. With the exception of two people, no one knew I was doing the tournament that's including my instructor Xande. Going into this I knew clearly I would have no one to lean on in defeat and No one to guide me through the storm. In other words I'd be fighting my own battle against the enemy that kept me down for so long.
5 days went by quicker than a beruibolo guard sweep as I soon found myself at the Grappling X tournament at Long Beach, Ca. With a great tournament running on time it was only a matter of time before I was about to fight. In the past I would very be nervous and resorted to various methods to get ready such as getting amped up, listening to gangster music, and even {no offense to those that do} read my bible which options DIDN'T help me at all. This time it felt different. If anything I was more anxious to get out there and see what was at the end of the tunnel after this great challenge.
In this process all I did was small warm ups every 15 minutes, I sat there, waited, and cited this message in my head.
“I am here to be a better man I once was. I give it everything I have today and see this battle through to the end"
Later getting called onto the mat I was surrounded by my 4 other competitors. One orange belt name Luke Varnell who dominated his teen division earlier that day, 2 blue belts from my own association {ribeiro affiliate}, and another great blue belt { Manual Figueroa from united bjj} who had a look in his eyes that he came to fight and destroy anyone in his path. To throw a wrench in the equation the referee for my matches was a former teammate of mine from Paragon/ HBJJ who in the past nagged on me for not competing...Talk about the sum of all fears -lol- today was going to be an interesting day.
So our division finally got started. Although I got a bye due to the odd number of competitors that didn't matter as Luke and Manuel made quick work of the other Ribeiro fighters. The crazy part was I didn't even analyze what the winner’s games plans were because I was focused greatly on my purpose.
Name got called onto the mat. THIS WAS IT!!! While standing across the mat looking at my first round opponent Luke Varnell I had a different perspective than I did before . Maybe I grown up a bit or whatever but I didn’t look at him as my enemy or having any hatred for him, as a matter of fact I had a lot of respect for him for being a real competitor. Unfortunately Luke was at the wrong place at the wrong time as he was going to get caught in the crossfire from my battle within. Utilizing the techniques I learned from Trumpet Dan and James Driskill back in 2011 I quickly pulled guard taking his back seconds in the match to secure a RNC finish in a little over a minutes. No victory celebration. I checked on my opponent to see if he was OK, got my hand raised, and walked off the mat.
Now I found myself in the finals against Manuel Figueroa (from United BJJ). Reflecting back on the match it is one I would love to do all over again. The match was defiantly a see-saw war. At one point during the fight while he was in my guard. In my mind I had a big smile on my face saying this and at that moment I realized no matter what the physical result were I knew I was beating those vices.
"There is no other place I rather be right now I am conquering this enemy (not Manuel) and enjoying every minute of it!”
With the match ending the score was tied 4-4 as we soon found ourselves going into overtime. WOW the battle is not over yet. With our bodies wreaked at this point it all came down to whose mind/heart was stronger (which both of ours were) and who wanted it more. Going back to my game plan I quickly pulled guard and miraculously got a sweep. Ending up in half guard with 30 seconds I continued to try and sweep (I don’t stall like most players it wouldn’t have been fair to Manuel). Match was over. When the smoke cleared it was me with my hand raised as the 135 Blue Belt Grappling X Champion that day.
After my hand was raised and thanking my opponent for a great fight I slammed the mat with emotion because I did it. All that pain I was carrying around for 7 years was completely gone. I felt like a totally new person. To say the least I was happy.
Standing on top of the podium that day I realized something those entire problems that entered my life were supposed to happen. It was that I overcame them that gave me a clear perception and appreciation of who I was which made my victory far greater than the Gold medal around my neck.
Originally this was supposed to be my one and only tournament...NOT...although I feel I have won the major battle the WAR from within is far from over. With my fresh new start I now have a solid purpose going out there now. It should be quiet the adventure.
I've never asked God for much in my life but as I continue to go out there and compete I only ask for a couple of things......................................
- To always give me the strength to give it everything I have
- Always respect my opponent (whether or not he does the same)
- Too take care of me and my opponent as we go out there and fight for what’s in our hearts
-Not get caught up in the materialistic MEDAL CHASING trend like so many choose to do
- Most importantly to always become a better man stepping off the battle mat (while enjoying my experience).
In other words folks I am not back to become a world champion (No IBJJF tournament for me). I am not back to become a famous grappler. I could care less about that and having 500 phonies (aka Man-Fans aka STANS) adding me to facebook pretending to like me just because I'm kicking ass. I am fine with the friends I have now that were with me during my struggle and when I was a nobody.
I am back for one reason and that is "To build myself into the man I want to be".
-monta
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